Marc's Reflection on Aikido & True Play

Ten Spectra?

November 14th, 2011 · No Comments

Opportunities and Antidotes?

More thought needed here.

I am looking for paired perspectives and practices.
grateful–resentful
Extended, happy vs. small, hard, hateful
serene–stressed
Big, grounded, relaxed vs. small, free floating, jerky
closeness–distrust
touching, trusting, caring vs. pushing, withdrawing
hopeful–fearful
personal stories are future rather than backward focused
joyful–unhappy
playful, togetherness, playful vs. alone, small, involuting
awe–angry
big (Thou-Thou) vs. small (I-It)
amused–embarrassed
big (we) vs small (you against me)
inspired–humiliated
big (future together) vs. small (you and me against me)
interested–disgust
big vs. small
proud–guilty
big vs. small

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Effectiveness through Aikido

November 14th, 2011 · No Comments

Daily, event by event, awareness of blending:

HOW BIG?

  1. Very Small–Self as It (Anti-self, anti-play, no smiles, lock down, a prison, closed, hidden, afraid, small, rigid… Frustrating, Shame, Shoving, Fear of failure
  2. Small–Self as Thou (relief, release, open, accepting of self and personal history with others, turning toward self, gentle, grounded, movable…
  3. Big enough–Other as Thou (Safe, shared care, mobile …)
  4. Very Big Thou-Thou (Big curiosity…Love…Playful…)

HOW CALM?

  1. Crazy (Uptight, disconnected, small, blind…)
  2. Controlled anxiety (Oriented to place and time, narrow focus, short sighted, controlling, fear based…)
  3. Shaky attempts at presence (Big enough to be aware of anxiety, awkwardness, breath…)
  4. Available from center (Big enough to ground and extend intermittently and partially)
  5. Able to move with whom and what comes up in a safe way (Big enough, grounded enough, flexible enough for flow to occur naturally)

HOW CONNECTED?

  1. Pushing away (Fear, control, anger, avoidance, unavailable from center, unable to move fluidly)
  2. Withdrawing (Fear, control, avoidance, unavailable from center, unable to move fluidly)
  3. Touching (Calm enough, trust, safety, shared care, curious, turning toward)
  4. Moving as one (Calm, safe, skilled at blending, “falling” into shared space)

HOW EFFECTIVE?

  1. Bad for all involved (painful for all and goals not accomplished)
  2. Goals accomplished with some dysphoria for all (was able to control this situation but at a cost to all because I was not connected)
  3. Goals accomplished with some dysphoria for me (was able to control this situation but at a cost mostly to me because I was not connected)
  4. Goals accomplished with happiness (Connected, moving as one, accomplishing shared goals in a playful way—together in shared context)

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